Pros and Cons: Stay at Home Mom

It’s a dream come true for every woman to be able to take care of her family and her career/job at the same time. However, often women find that they have to juggle between those two. So, in the end, they have to decide whether they want to sacrifice family or career / job.

Keeping Both Family and Career /Job

Some pointers here for those who want to keep both family and career:

• Are you working in a family oriented company?

If you are, then congratulations, you might be able to do so. But as far as I know such company does not exist. All I hear is most employees’ career will be jeopardized if too much leave taken for the purpose of family issues, going home sharp because you need to cook, pickup your children from day care ,etc. The working environment is different nowadays; it is vicious for those who have family commitments.

• Are you working for a career or just to make ends meet?

Sometimes a job which does not promise any prospect is not really a career. Most of the time it’s just for the money, money to pay bills and to save for future either for retirement or children’s education. If you think that the money you bring home will help to supplement’s family daily needs then you have to calculate how much you are really bringing home. The calculation have to take into account tax, transportation, fuel expenses, work clothes, lunches with colleagues, company trip expenses and other outings involving your work. If the money that you bring home is not much, then it may not be worth to sacrifice your family over your job.

A Stay at Home Mom

I believe that before one decided to be a stay at home mom, the most crucial thing is to discuss with their spouse whether they are supportive of the decision to stay at home and look after the family. If the other spouse is not supportive then there is no point to be a stay at home mom. It takes two people to have a family, without one there is no family.

Pros of being a stay at home mom


• watch your babies touch their 1st milestone

• play with them

• read to them

• talk to them

• more time for husband and children

• If time is well organized, you will have time to explore you hobby. It might turn to a business and earn some side income for the family.

• research on the best methods of parenting, provide family in their best environment

• cook for the family

• no more unhealthy outside food

• save on work clothes and transport fees

• Able to organize time to suit the needs of the family. No more stay back in the office

Cons of being a stay at home mom


• have to watch spending very closely

• use a lot of effort to come up with cheap and nutritional menus

• Unable to spend on luxuries such as clothes, makeup, shoes or fashion accessories. I love fashion, so to sacrifice on these items are tough for me but I know in time I’ll get use to it or even better I’ll find ways to do it cheaply. Maybe I should do my own clothes or bags because I’ve been cutting my own hair as well as my baby’s.

• I have to think thrice before buying things that aren’t in the top priority

• Not able to socialize because they need time and money. I can’t go out and have fun with my friends because baby needs a lot of attention and I don’t feel secure putting my baby under somebody else’s care.

• It’s a 24/7 job without pay. The only rest time is when my baby sleeps.

• At times when your family comes first you will start to loose your ‘self’.

• Stay at home can be lonely at times in terms of not getting understanding from other family members or friends

• Your future retirement expenses depend entirely on your husband

• Bias perception from the society. It is still the society perception that a stay at home mom is a “frog that lives underneath a coconut shell”.

To conclude, although we give up career or stop working because of family, along the way we have to figure out that in the meantime of staying at home we have to pry ourselves to look for ways to have financial independence. If the issue of financial independence for stay at home mom is resolved then all else will be a breeze.

It started very cloudy very early in the morning and I thought it was going to rain.Nonetheless, it gets hot later in the afternoon.

I consider today is the most boring and quiet day. Me and my baby didn't have much activity. Probably we had too much adventure yesterday. Yesterday I went back to my parents house and in the morning we had some morning stroll at the park,try to get Marcus some sun. Also, yesterday is the day I receive a lot of viewers from my writing job. So very motivated after a few articles that didn't gain much attention.I got zero viewing mostly. This keeps me ponder about this blog that I'm doing. I haven't have a clear idea as to what should this blog potray. Should it be just my diary? or should it be informative ? informative about how to manage a life as a SAHM? SAHM financial? if you notice I still leave my personal details blank. I am still thinking of the words to put to potray the kind of blog that I'm going to do.

Mundane as it sounds, it is spice with a little frustration being that Marcus doesn't want to eat the food that I cook for him. I prepared for him Hummus sandwiches but he spit out every bite and scrunch it with his hand, mop them on his table and finally threw them on the floor. My heart came crushing down. As though a mother's love being treated like a mop and trash. Oh well couldn't blame him, he is just a baby. Fortunate part is he sip my watercress, carrot and huge red dates soup. Hurrayyyyy!

Some of my baby Marcus photos...

Finally I get my “me” time blogging when my baby is taking a nap. He is 16th month old now. Last week he had been clingy and crying a lot, I suspect that he is bored living in a room with not much activities. “Bad mommy not having more activities for baby.” Ok, so this week I’ve given him a lot of physical play such as cushion battling with him, arrange pillows on the bed as obstacle for him to climb over and sliding down, play him children songs and start with his flash card set to stimulate his right brain.


I have such enthusiastic to get my baby to start on flashcards after reading the website http://brillbaby.com/. Why? If I’m a baby now I would want to know how to read so that I can gain all sorts of knowledge. I love to read a lot. Hmmmm the smell of books just give me the ecstasy.

After he turned 15months he tried to show his independence, he tried to use the spoon to feed himself, running off in shopping centre, demand things and if not given he will cry and scream or sit on the floor stomping his feet. Oh how I miss him when he was 4 to 6 months old.

I just look at some of my son’s photos….. just want to share it with you all.

                                                     Hi! I'm just few days old.

                                           gurrrrr I can sleep all day...

                                            Oh no I'm wearing an oversize sunglass...mommy,why you cut my hair like that?

                                             duhhh ....i'm drooling...hanky please...

                                           *smile* I love you mommy , daddy

gurrrrr.... milk milk milk milk.......i'm dreaming lots of milk coming my way..

mucho mucho man .....after drinking my milk ...

Monkey see, monkey do....

i'm flying ....

somebody please hold down my hair..

you wanna piece of me...

coochi coochi cooo....heheheh

A Tree: My Life Symbol

I just love to look at trees whenever I can from outside the window. It just gave me peace. A tree just sits peacefully on the ground. Its beautiful branches bloomed with leaves just swayed whenever the wind brushes through. Birds or any other living creatures depend on it as a resting place, a home or a roof against the heating sun. It took a great deal of time for its trunk to grow strong rooted from the ground. No matter how the weather is, the tree will just sit strong on the earth embracing the passing rainbow and thunderstorm.

If you can just take a moment and look at trees and ponder about its existence, you will know that there are many great life lessons to be learned from a tree. I hope I could be a strong tree one day. If we are going through blissfully happy moments, then we have to be mindful that it’s there and cherish it with all our might. If we are going through painful hardships, then we have to be silent and let it passes through.

Recently, the trees where I lived were all cut down to make way for human vehicles. Those trees would have stand rooted for more than thirty years and it just take a few days for them to be cut down. Life is just unfair. A life with its purest heart and grace will be sacrificed for another life that has more crude power. Haven’t they thought that those trees can be moved to another ground? Obviously, the words “love”, “care”, ”selflessness”, “Karma” is obsolete. I believe whoever have a strong valid reason of doing so prevails.